What a fine morning!

I just found my note in the last few pages of my note book when I had meeting several days ago. The topic of the meeting was kinda boring and not actually relate to my job, so I wasted time turning pages in my note book.

The note is a poem I wrote months ago.. when my heart felt really light..

What A Fine Morning!

Entered the day by praying & asking guidance from Almighty God
There was still morning quarrel with other family members
But we had breakfast together and laughed together

The weather was cool with some warm sunshine
The traffic was well move on

Supporting by encouraging songs, made a quite and perfect morning

Though people rushed in, but there was a peace in mind
that ready to face problems a long day ahead

May I see you again
A fine, quite and perfect morning!

It’s just a simple poem
That kind of day is rarely happen again until now
But I believe I will see it again..

I need a hug, but somebody need it more..

Today was quite a hectic day.. I went from one meeting to another meeting, one problem to another problem, without having time to touch my daily tasks..

Then I took a breath and went to pantry to make a cup of tea.. In the silent pantry while making the tea, I was thinking.. I’m really tired.. What do I need to ease my feeling and gain some spirit? Then a thought came to me.. I need a hug.. Someone who would hug me and say that everything will be fine.. I don’t need all my problems to be disappeared, as new problems may come.. I need someone to comfort me..

Then not long later I got a message from my junior on university, one of my best friend, the one I consider as my sister. She told her problem in her family, how she felt so sad and disappointed. She said sorry to disturb me while I work, but she need to tell someone her feeling.

I felt so sorry for her, I felt sad. Then I realized, she need a hug more than me.. I wished I could hug her and tell that everything will be fine..

How strange that it was not happen only once that sometimes you just feel the need to give something to someone else, something that you actually need and ask.. How God teach us to give while we in need.. to encourage us to be less pitying ourselves.. that we should not focus on ourselves..

For those who need a hug.. give someone a hug and you’ll get a hug back..

Chocolate Cookies

I made cookies because I carelessly said to my office mates that I want to make some cookies.. then they said I have to bring them..

The hard part for making cookies is at the shopping time.. It takes hours and energy.. huffft..

So I did made cookies in the night between 9PM to 1AM

Below was the result:

And from the last dough I made quite big cookie shaped christmas tree.. yayy..

Well, after my friend try them they said it was good.. and they asked for another one.. sponge cake.. let’s see if I can satisfy them later.. hahaha..

This Country I really Love

Indonesia may not a famous name in the world, though it is a big country with the 4th highest population amount in the world
People know Bali better.. while Bali is just one of more than 17.000 islands in this country or one of hundreds great destination for holiday..

But it is not about the place that I want to tell here
It’s about the people in this country
There are hundreds of races and local languages in here
There are 5 major religions
But there is one culture they share

They use to live the hard way since colonialism by Dutch for centuries until 66 years ago
But in the hard time they can smile
They believe in togetherness
They believe in peace
They believe that neighbors can be closer than relatives
They believe in happiness in modest way
They believe they should help people around

I have heard that internationally Indonesia is considered as the nicest country, as the country of people with most beautiful smile.. regardless in contradiction also famous of some terorism stories
I do agree with the first.. But I don’t agree for the second one.. not that I’m in majority religion here.. I do in the minority side.. Yes we have to struggle sometimes.. especially for people in the country side.. but I do believe everything’s getting better as there is growing understanding..

I do believe this country will be much nicer in the future..

I haven’t gone abroad but as I heard stories and I believe in my heart.. no place will replace this country..

Don’t hear the news only.. please read all testimonials.. and you’ll find out that you will be longing to go to this country..

Well it will take a while to go around Indonesia.. I myself haven’t got a chance.. but you can just taste little to be falling in love with my Indonesia!!

*As a tribute to National team of Soccer of Indonesia. I wrote this after we get defeated by Malaysia (21-11-11), but I respect your endless effort my dear heros!!

Is it only just a dream?

I got a beautiful dream Monday night.. I don’t know why I have such a dream.. when all gathering with no argument and we all are happy..

It was so beautiful.. lately I feel that life in dream is more beautiful than real life.. I feel it hard to wake up every morning..

Accidentally recently I love song ‘just a dream’ by Drew (X Factor). It was about past love.. but the reffrein just really suitable with my situation:

I was thinking bout him, think about me, think about us
What we gonna be?
Open my eyes, it was only just a dream
So I travelled back, down that road
Wish he’d come back, no one knows
I realized, it was only just a dream..

This feeling I hate

The feeling I hate when I got, is not angry.. for angry make you know what is important and what you love..
The feeling I hate is not also sad.. For sad give you time to reflect and the sad ones will be rejoiced by the best time..
The feeling I hate is not love.. for that is the best feeling in life.. whether loved back or not..

The feeling I hate is
When I don’t know what I’m feeling
When I don’t know what to do
When I’m afraid to say anything
When I have to be strict for love
When I can’t do something beyond my power
When I see love ones sad and can’t do anything
When I feel confuse for the purpose of my life
When I’m afraid I can’t reach my dream
When I’m not brave enough to tell someone that he’s wrong
When I’m not brave enough to tell someone that I love him

My Prayer Tonight..

Dear God.. Thanks that You had accompany me today.. there are many things I want to pray to You tonight..

*I pray for heartbreaks, both her and him.. Help them to appreciate the process.. I hope for both happiness and love..
*I pray for my school mate that has injury because of accident.. Let him heal soon..
*I also pray for Your servant who will be surged at monday.. Please help him heal soon.. Please also help for the financial problem..
*I pray for my best friend who had fight with his brother.. Let them reconciled God.. Let Your love be the base in their relationship..
*I pray for my family in Christ, in their suffering may they have stronger faith in You..
*I pray for myself that I can be better woman that you want me to be.. I pray that I don’t give only words to pray but also hands to help..

Let this pray heard by You God.. with all the wishes in my heart that all can love You and find happiness in You..

Loneliness

“Loneliness knows everything I keep inside
My endless thought in the silence of the night”
~ Loneliness knows me by name *Westlife

Well.. this is a never ending topic through the ages..
But the point that I learned is,
Loneliness is not depend on the numbers of people around you, whether it’s zero (no one) or a bunch, you can feel lonely in both situations. It’s mainly related to the relationship, any kind of relationship. You will feel the most lonely when you feel there is no one relates to you, no one even knows you are there, no one thinks your presence is important. Well, people actually realize that kind of thinking is wrong, and of course there must be someone glad that you are born to the world.. but people can’t help to be lonely.. so people try to find many ways to keep away from loneliness which usually makes them fall deeper..

For me, it’s no use to fight it.. accept it.. while I try to surrender to God.. at least He is always around you right? So feel Him.. and get away that loneliness.. read His love letter.. you’ll feel warm inside.. Cry out to Him if you need, but also give your best smile when you’re happy..

He’s there.. Loneliness is nothing to fear about..

Fruits Jelly

Yayyyy… my friend at office offered me to buy Tupperwre box at 30% off, so I took a look at the catalog. Well, I do plan to buy one set of 3 small boxes, but I also saw an interesting fruits jelly in a picture there… Huhuuhu..

So despite of limited money I had in the end of month, I bought some fruits!!! Hahahahaha

I made Jelly with fruits: Strawberry, Pear, Apple, Bengkoang, Longan and Mango.. yippie.. Better with Grapes and Kiwi actually.. but it’s expensiveeee… huaa…

These are the finish pictures:

You make me wanna say ‘I do love you!’

Just found a great and cheerful song by Colbie Caillat, “I do”. It tells about a girl who is sure about the man she is with now, to live together and build a family. It tells a great story that make her forget the pain she ever felt in relationship before.

I wonder when I will found this great man that will make me wanna say “I do!” even before he ask

So.. this is the lyric:

It’s always been about me myself and I
If all relationships were nothing but a waste of time
I never wanted to be anybody’s other half
I was happy sayin our love wouldn’t last
That was the only way I knew til I met you

You make we wanna say
I do, I do, I do, do do do do do do doo
Yeah, I do, I do, I do, do do do do do do doo
Cause every time before we spend like
Maybe yes and maybe no
I can live without it, I can let it go
Ooh, what did I get myself into
You make we wanna say I do, I do, I do, I do, I do, I do,
Tell me is it only me
Do you feel the same?
You know me well enough to know that I’m not playing games
I promise I won’t turn around and I won’t let you down
You can trust I never felt it like I feel it now
Baby there’s nothing, there’s nothing we can’t get through

So can we say
I do, I do, I do, do do do do do do doo
Oh baby, I do, I do, I do, do do do do do do doo
Cause every time before we spend like
Maybe yes and maybe no
I won’t live without it, I won’t let it go
Wooh Can I get myself into
You make we wanna say

Me a family, a house a family
Ooh, can we be a family?
And when I’m 80 years old and sittin next to you.

And when we remember when we said
I do, I do, I do, do do do do do do doo
Oh baby, I do, I do, I do, do do do do do do doo
Cause every time before we spend like
Maybe yes and maybe no
I won’t live without it, I won’t let us go
Just look at what we got ourselves into
You make we wanna say I do, I do, I do, I do, I do, I do,
Love you